Long Distance

"This long distance is killing me.."

So many loved ones have been away from me for quite a long time now. In times when I see their faces, but only in my mind, and sometimes on FB, I miss them more each time, especially when I am left alone at home, hopelessly waiting for my sleep, at one night, never came at all, not even a glance. :((

Hindi lang buwan, kungdi taon na ang nakalipas at halos lahat silang mahal ko sa buhay, ni hindi ku man nasilayan.. The feeling is very different once you finally see them, compared to the one you feel when you just finished your random phone conversations.

These past few weeks, I've experienced the feeling that I needed to wait for my body to get exhausted first to get its sleep: likened myself to an ordinary vehicle, I needed to lose all my fuel before I can go to sleep. This kind of feeling pisses me off, that it pisses me too much, I can break down into tears at that very moment of mixed helplessness, hopelessness, desperation, frustration, some guilt and misfortune. Feeling ko talaga, "Why on earth?!" Tipong naiiyak nako na walang magawa but to say, "please, go to sleep. T.T" Magbuwisit naku talaga kanita.. :)) ..at lalu ku lapang amis ri mama ku, e lola Paz ku, reng anti ku, basta ing pamilya ku. Ngeni kasi meju rough ing family life ku kaya aside from God, my only solid source of strength is myself.

But my life has to go on however shaky it may be.. I'm sure it leads somewhere far better than where I am now. Bahala na.. But I hope my personal life and family life get better as each days passes by, with the love and guidance of the Lord and my friends. Anyway, I still have my Public Relations class tomorrow so I better start waiting for my sleep now. T.T

Thank you for reading.

PS: You might want to hear and see the actual music video, just click the link below.

"..Can you hear me crying? It's so hard.. ..I wish you were here with me."

                                      -- Long Distance, Brandy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDp1dpuwCkY)